I’ve been missing drugs lately. I really hope i have the will power to stay away from the hard ones at least. But, i miss the feeling, and the bonding it brought on sometimes. I don’t miss a lot of it, mostly how ashamed i felt afterward and the fear of losing myself to them, but I do miss them, like I’m sure most people end up doing. If i didn’t have a kid now there would be nothing stopping me. I just have a urge to go out one more time and get it out of my system for good, even though i like i could do that I’m not stupid and that’s not how drugs work. I really want the will power and i really want the high. God, i hope i don’t give in, though…
Awww, so sweet. ❤ she is a healthy happy little girl. I think she is a pretty good newborn. Only cries when it’s necessary. Right now I’m answering this during a 6am feeding, so that’s mostly how it’s going, me trying to juggle sleeping and also functioning. Im very lucky to have all the help i do have though, and each day is better than the next. Thanks for the love and support! 👑💓
Yeah, I took it down when i found out I was pregnant. Thank you, I miss taking them sometimes, but, I had my fun. After all this stuff I knew I had to change the way I carry myself and what I allow people to know and see. Thank you for being a fan, though.
I go in at midnight (the 18) to be induced..
I’m really fucking bummed bc I bought Bright Eyes tickets, thinking I’d give birth in October.. But then my dr was like no we are gonna take her early so now I’m missing the concert… And that was gonna be my first real concert too, but now I’m selling the tickets to some guy and i keep trying to forget about it and not be so bummed bc I’ll have a kid but man im sad about it. …..
I like to believe i don’t get on tumblr bc i got a life..
But the truth is I don’t get on bc I don’t have internet anymore.
Not creepy. Thanks love. It’s always nice to hear words of encouragement.
It’s all very new and scary. Certainly a cocktail of emotions. Tbh, I’m not a fan of the pregnancy part very much at all. Also, recently my dr told me that instead of my due date being Oct. 1st its gonna be two weeks earlier I’m a little more scared. I’m also bummed bc I had Bright Eyes tickets and i probably won’t be able to go. But my little girl will be here and I’m sure it’ll over shadow that fact..
A month and a half.