I’ve only been used, never allowed myself to be cherished. I was consumed, and in that consumption, I lost my humanity. I never set limits or told myself I was worth anyone’s true affection. And in that I lost my ability to enjoy other peoples happiness. I told myself, this is all I’ll ever be and in that I became someone I truly hated..
Haha no I’m not cody, but i forsure hope y’all to fire up
Being around my brother is a constant fucking bummer he’s an adult but he acts completely helpless, he’s beaten the shit out of me multiple times and is sure he’s done nothing wrong and when he’s rude or in the way i have no right to say or do anything bc he’s more scary than new. Him and his gf are seriously the two worst people to be around i cant fucking do it anymore… His literal only goal in life right now is to fail probation and go to jail.. Meanwhile i have to clean up after him everyday…we have to hide our money and car keys… Computers.. Anything worth any money and he still wants us to give to him and treat him like a wounded puppy it’s been like this for like 4 years… I can’t fucking handle it anymore we all want him in jail so not only can we live in peace but we don’t have to worry if he’s oded or killed someone else… I’m tired of him thinking he’s the only person to ever have a problem just i wish he was out of my life…. Not dead… But just not anywhere near me on a day to day basis FUCK
So there is a possibility that the father of this kid is someone even MORE disgusting to me than the guy who took advantage of me…
I just am disgusted with myself… I already love this baby but I wish it was under better terms.. My mom keeps telling me it doesn’t matter who the father is bc she is my baby and just to look at it that way…
I’m just grossed out that I even had sex with either of them.
I still can’t wait to see and hold little SALEM…,